Embracing Boundaries: A Guide for Autistic and ADHD Individuals

Boundaries are the limits we set to protect our physical, emotional, and mental well-being. They define what we are comfortable with and how we want others to treat us. For autistic and ADHD individuals, setting and maintaining boundaries is crucial. These boundaries help us manage our energy, reduce anxiety, and create a safe space where we can thrive.

Why Boundaries Matter

1. Self-Preservation: Boundaries help prevent burnout and sensory overload. By recognizing and respecting our limits, we protect ourselves from overwhelming situations.
2. Respect: Enforcing boundaries teaches others how to treat us with the respect we deserve. It’s a way of saying, “I value myself and my needs.”
3. Empowerment: Setting boundaries is an act of self-empowerment. It’s a declaration that we are in control of our lives and our choices.

The Value of Firm Boundaries

Our unique impairments are not something to apologize for. In fact, they come with unique abilities and skills that we might not have discovered yet. It took me 30 years to uncover my gifts and abilities. (sytemizing! I know I keep saying it, but it works- reduce anxiety-reduce being overstimulated-then the brain works! Surprise! I was overstimulated for 30 years straight- brain fog, reduced cognitive ability, poor memory and reduced ability to learn- seriously I was a mess)

Discovering Your Value

No one’s opinion of you determines your value as a person. From the moment you were born, you were destined for greatness. Greatness doesn’t always happen overnight. Some of the greatest inventors and creators did so later in life. First, you have to discover the wonders of yourself—all the good with the bad—and accept it as it is.

Acceptance and Growth

Acceptance doesn’t mean resignation; it means seeing the full picture of who you are and using what you’ve got to achieve what you want. Where there is a will, there is a way. Don’t let anyone take away your light or tell you to be anyone but yourself. You are perfect just as you are.

The Power of Community

When I look at the Google Earth project I created, I see that you are one of many. Together, we stand strong. We are a community, each managing our energy and boundaries in our unique ways.

Practical Tips for Setting Boundaries

1. Know Your Limits: Understand what you can handle physically, emotionally, and mentally. Don’t push beyond these limits.
2. Communicate Clearly: Be clear and assertive when expressing your boundaries. Use “I” statements, like “I need some quiet time now.”
3. Practice Saying No: It’s okay to say no. It’s healthy and necessary to preserve your energy and well-being.
4. Seek Support: Surround yourself with people who respect your boundaries and encourage you to maintain them.
5. Reflect and Adjust: Regularly reflect on your boundaries and adjust them as needed. Your needs may change over time, and that’s perfectly okay.

Final Thoughts

Remember, you are the manager of yourself. You are the boss. It’s okay to say no, and it’s very healthy to do so. Embrace your boundaries, stand firm in your worth, and shine your light brightly. You are perfect just as you are.